I love to write. It’s something God has gifted me with and I
love to use it to share what He’s doing in and through His Body in the jungle.
I’m passionate about it.
But something I’ve noticed in this social-media-saturated
culture is that people are overwhelmed by media. Pictures, articles, words.
They are all over our phones, tablets, computers, billboards, TVs.
It’s numbing.
So in keeping with my desire to always be transparent, I’ll
be honest and say I feel so often like my words are useless. Like I’m sharing
my passions... with a wall. And that can be disheartening. We’ve spent nearly
four years of our lives doing some crazy awesome things on this beautiful
journey that God has led us on. We can hardly believe the things God is doing
and I want to share those with everyone and yet... not many people care.
Now, don’t get me wrong. Some people care deeply. And there are a
few people who have consistently written us and encouraged us over the last
four years and several have been faithful to pray and give. And we are so thankful because at times their words and prayers have been what God has used to sustain us.
Loneliness has been a companion these last four years. But God has been faithful
to use that for His glory and our good. We’ve seen Him build up a community of
people in the jungle, nearly all locals, that we now call family.
Unfortunately, we’ve had many share their opinions on our
lives from afar. Most of whom have never actually visited the work that God is
doing in the jungle. They don’t know the names of our Brothers and Sisters
laboring and sacrificing there. They don’t write or pray or give. They don’t
know us. But they comment nonetheless, making judgment calls from afar.
And that’s ok. I’ve been guilty of the same in other
peoples’ lives. It’s hard to understand
something you haven’t experienced. I pray that they can see, but maybe that’s
not what God has. That’s ok, too.
While I’m slowly but surely losing the desire to try to get
everyone to understand something that I can’t fully grasp—the fact that God’s
ways are not ours and often our plans fall flat as we follow His leading
instead—I feel like I owe it to those who have been on this journey with us to
tell the story of how God is moving us.
In September we are moving to Mexico.
Ok. So the reality is, it’s actually Laredo, Texas, which is
on the border of Mexico ("I can see Mexico from my house!"). But if you’ve ever been there, you know that it’s a
lot more like Mexico than the US of A!
This may seem really sudden to some of you. And in some ways
it is. In other ways, however, God has had this transition in the works for quite
some time. The last time we had genuinely considered that God was leading us
this way was in 2014. God had closed doors to aviation in Brazil. We still felt
very strongly that our calling was to use aviation as a means of spreading the
Gospel when God put an aviation job offer for Laredo, TX in front of us. We
prayed. We fasted. We sought godly counsel. And we decided that was the
direction God was leading us. It would allow us to fund Grace House as well as
the other ministries much more efficiently. So, we pursued it wholeheartedly
{is there any other way to do it?}. Heck, we had even told several supporters
and supporting churches about it. Then God slammed that door closed through
Mariclene’s inability to immigrate to the US.
We were thoroughly confused to say the absolute least.
But after a brief period of disappointment and feeling
totally perplexed, we hoped right back in the saddle again and saw God do some
incredible things. Grace House roots grew deeper along with the relationships
He had given us in Benjamin. We moved across the border into Colombia where
Richard began avidly working towards opening an air ambulance. We got to know
amazing people in Leticia, where God gave us new relationships and lives to
speak into as well as some of our now closest friends. It was also during that
time that The Donut Company was born.
To be honest, we were feeling quite settled! We laughed
about the time we thought we were moving back Stateside and we began to plan
what life would look like spending the rest of it right there in Leticia. The
Air Ambulance had the potential to fund all of the work, employ locals, help
meet physical needs, and fulfill our calling to use aviation as a tool for the
Gospel. Boom. The whole package.
Then January 2016 rolled around and God closed the door to
the air ambulance. And what’s more, we had really worked ourselves out of a
job. Grace House is growing and we have seen truly incredible spiritual growth
among the community of believers in the small town of Benjamin. Marcos and Josi
continue to rock it with the young men in their discipleship program and we
simply help fund their efforts and provide encouragement and support the Javari Project. The Donut
Company is growing and totally operated by locals. Of course we were heavily
involved in the day to day, but we had to come to the realization that, while
we could continue to work hard with our brothers and sisters, we still felt
like a part of our calling was being neglected. And certainly not through lack
of effort! God had divinely opened and closed doors, leading us on a crazy
adventure that we never imagined.
So we just began praying. Would God have us move to another
country for mission aviation? Would he reopen a door in this region? We just
didn’t feel led a specific way.
Fast-forward to February when we get the news that
Mariclene’s immigration was finally approved after two and a half years of
waiting. We were stoked! We made plans to travel to the States for her
citizenship interview and stay for about two months to raise more funds for the
crazy awesome things God was doing. So much is happening and there are so many
needs, that the primary need was funds.
So we came to the US and in the first week must have said to
one another at least a dozen times, “I never want to live here again!” It’s
just this massive reverse-culture shock. It’s hard to explain until you
experience it, but it’s very real. We were still praying that God would lead us
if He had a new direction for our family in aviation but we were also counting
down the days to our return to Leticia {home}.
That’s when the e-mail came late one evening from the same
friend from two years back, the first communication about a job since that time.
“Would you still be interested in a job in Laredo?”
I knew the look on Richard’s face when he showed me
the e-mail. I immediately pushed it off and told him I had no desire to even
discuss that. Absolutely not. No.
But the reality was I already knew in my heart that it was
time. We had been in regular contact with our ministry partners in Benjamin and
Leticia and they were doing great! Not to say they weren’t passing through
trials. They were. Some pretty serious ones in fact. But they were thriving in
the peace of God. They were growing, discipling, reaching out, going above and
beyond, loving, giving, serving.
And they didn’t need us in the day to day. Honestly, it was
a blow to realize that. Don’t get me wrong, I totally rejoiced in it, too!
That’s the point after all, right? To disciple others who disciple others and so on.
Our dreams have actually come true.
But these are my people. They have walked through the valleys of darkness and suffered with us. We’ve cried and laughed together for going on four years. I wanted to be there, enjoying the fruits of our labor. After so many years of loneliness and isolation, we finally have a community that is on fire!
That’s the point after all, right? To disciple others who disciple others and so on.
Our dreams have actually come true.
But these are my people. They have walked through the valleys of darkness and suffered with us. We’ve cried and laughed together for going on four years. I wanted to be there, enjoying the fruits of our labor. After so many years of loneliness and isolation, we finally have a community that is on fire!
And now, it is time to move on to the next location.
I’m not going to lie. I’ve fought God on this one. I’ve
cried until my heart physically aches and there aren’t any more tears. This is
all my kids have known. This is all we have worked for for the last seven
years, to love and reach the lost in the Amazon region.
So what does this mean now? Why would He take us from the
Jungle to the Desert?
Well, I can assure you it’s not because we are wishy-washy
as some accuse. It’s not because we don’t know what we really want as others
have said. In fact, we could technically be flying in Brazil OR Colombia right now had we
been willing to compromise some really strong convictions (but that’s another
story). It isn’t because we couldn’t handle it. (Although, I will say that NO
ONE can handle it. Absolutely no one. Only Christ in us and in others can
sustain in such a difficult place.) No, it’s none of those things.
The reality is, our calling is apostolic in nature. That
means that by nature we equip and move on, much like Paul did. We’ve seen that
has been the course that God has led us on our whole life. (If that confuses
you, join the club. We are learning this role.)
We’ve spent the last few months “rearranging” a bit with the
Amazon Network. We are learning our new role in the Body as advocate for the
jungle and we are praying hard and looking with anticipation as to what God has
for us in Laredo.
One of the most beautiful things about it is that by us
coming off of support, those funds can now go directly to the work in the
jungle. Grace House, The Donut Company, the Javari Project can now be funded
more efficiently which means there is more opportunity for growth. We’ve
already seen new outreaches being launched from the network and more Brothers
and Sisters join our family--your family.
It’s incredible how God works in the most organic of ways when we truly allow His Spirit to guide.
It’s incredible how God works in the most organic of ways when we truly allow His Spirit to guide.
We want it to be clear that we are not leaving the network
or the work there. We will continue to visit frequently and we have daily
communication. We are advocates for our Brothers and Sisters there and continue
to fund-raise and raise awareness. But now the funds will be liberated and we
can start again in Laredo, trusting the Holy Spirit to lead us as we seek to
serve the least of these there.
Pray for us all as we make this transition. We sold
everything before we moved nearly four years ago so it’s very much like
starting over physically as well as mentally. It’s a strange thing to be back
in the city you grew up in and yet feel like you know no one. You miss a lot in
four years and reverse culture shock is a doozie.
If you have questions, feel free to ask us. We have always
strived to be transparent so we welcome feedback and dialogue.
Thank you to all of you who are walking this journey with
us. We greatly appreciate each of you and we look forward to the adventures
ahead!
This is not the end of the book, just a new chapter... I hope you’ll continue reading.
This is not the end of the book, just a new chapter... I hope you’ll continue reading.
A little recap of our life for the last four years....
Bittersweet, friend. So grateful for you!
ReplyDeleteBittersweet, indeed. Thanks for walking this journey with me!
DeleteExcited for you guys and this new phase the Lord has for you. My prayer is for you and your kids as you re adjust to life in the US... I know it's hard.
ReplyDeleteI know you personally understand this. Thanks for the prayers! It's much harder than I would've dreamed.
DeleteExcited for you guys and this new phase the Lord has for you. My prayer is for you and your kids as you re adjust to life in the US... I know it's hard.
ReplyDeleteWOW!!!! WOW! and WOW! God's ways are not our ways, are they? I am excited for you! But I totally understand the reverse culture thing; we've been back 18 months and I still feel it. My heart is still in two places. I miss so much about the DR, but we have no doubt that this is what God has planned for us now. It's strange when God plants something in your heart and you feel it's forever; then He says, "Nope, that was just to get you going. Now, this is the next step..." So glad to see you following HIM! We will be praying for you as you make some major changes and adjustments. (Wish you could totally ignore the naysayers; but sadly, they never seem to go away.)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Anna!! You have been one of the few constant encouragers on this journey. Thank you for that. Your words have brought life many times!!
ReplyDeleteThankful that the LORD has used me to be an encouragement. :)
DeleteGod has led you guys on an incredible journey in your 30 years! I'm excited to see what he continues to do in your lives! Love you guys! Keep up the writing. You have a great gift!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Rach! I'm grateful for the time we had working together. You've inspired me so much over the years!
DeleteWell said! Praying for you all in this next God adventure!
ReplyDeletePraying for ya'll as you transition. Keep doing what you are doing...trusting God and leaving the consequences to Him.
ReplyDeleteKandi
Oh man, I can't believe I missed this post. Friends, dear friends. My heart goes out to you. God does work in crazy ways and it's difficult when He leads you down a path and then changes the trajectory. Kyle and I have been on this type of journey ourselves. The last 8 months and most recent 4 have been full of anxiety, depression, conflict, and tears. It's so hard to let go of a path that He led you on and then you cling to, not wanting to let go. But His new direction can't be ignored. I really understand this. I would really love to talk with you, Ashley. I would love to talk and pray for you because Kyle and I love you both and support you both. We want to be with you as much as we can, even if separated by distance. Please let me know when I can call you. Love, Steph
ReplyDeleteWell, maybe I missed it but after reading the post above I still have no idea what you guys will be doing in Laredo! Is this just a move back to the states with a job or is there a ministry involved? Sorry!
ReplyDeleteKeith Wheatley
Mary Beth sent this on to me. You are a gifted writer, Ashley. The Lord be with both of you as you make another major transition. Sometimes I wish God would reveal the future, but generally looking back I'm glad He didn't! If your travels bring you through Waxhaw, stop in and stay with us.
ReplyDeleteJeff Johnson
JAARS